5 Manly Lessons From Playing Board Games
Earlier this year, we heard about The Art of Manliness website. It’s a fantastic site and we’ll tell you why in our next post. But for today, we want to share an article we wrote that we think fits in very well with The Art of Manliness.
5 Manly Lessons From Playing Board Games
“Do not pass Go, Do not collect $200.”
“It takes a steady hand.”
“Double word score.”
“You sank my Battleship!”
“Checkmate!”
It may have been a while since you’ve heard some of those phrases around your table. But chances are pretty high that you know exactly where they come from.
Board games are such a popular pastime that almost everyone in the world has played one. They’re a great way to enjoy time with family and friends.
With thousands of new board games, card games, dice games, and party games being released each year, they’re also much more than just kids toys. They’re played by young and old alike across a myriad of cultures.
Board games also teach great life lessons.
Even with such a huge variety of tabletop games and play experiences, there are 5 essential lessons that board games can teach you about being a man:
1. Taking Turns Shows Respect
The most common “lesson learned” referred to about playing board games is the lesson of taking turns. It’s perhaps the most common lesson because it’s such a core game mechanic of most games and especially children’s game. Kids instinctively want to forge ahead while parents have to frequently remind them it’s not their turn.
Waiting for their turn to spin the spinner in Chutes and Ladders or flip a color card in Candyland is a painful process for most youngsters.
By taking turns we not only learn that there’s an order to things but we also learn about respect for others. And being a man definitely requires respect for others.
We show our respect for others in many ways, but one clear way is in allowing others to take their turn. Being a gentleman and letting ladies pass through a door first. Not cutting in front of people in lines. Or allowing others the chance to express their opinion without cutting them off.
2. Obey the Laws
In addition to learning to respect others, playing board games help us learn to respect the rules. Or in other words, the laws of the game. Game rules provide structure for player interaction.
If you’ve ever pulled out game pieces and tried playing without knowing the rules, you’ll have a sense for what a world without laws might be like. A lot of chaos and confusion may lead to dangerous results.
The same holds true when players try to circumvent the rules or don’t think a particular rule should apply to them. In other words, cheat. A previous Art of Manliness article, which we’d highly recommend, addressed cheating in great detail. And the conclusion there is the same here – obey the rules/laws. Real men don’t cheat.
3. Pay Attention and Prepare
When it’s your turn to make a move in a board game, it’s easy to focus on the task at hand. But what do you do while others are taking their turns? Does your mind (or even you body) wander off to different things? Or do you get ready for your next move and think about what might come?
When it’s not our turn to take action in a game or when the pressure isn’t directly on us, it’s tempting to let our guard down. However, those are most often the best times to prepare for what’s ahead.
Chess is a great example. In order to do well in chess, it’s imperative to pay attention to an opponent’s moves as well as use that time to adjust one’s own strategy and plan the next moves.
As a man, there are a lot of things we need to pay attention to. If we don’t keep an eye on the right things, we might be caught off guard. Whether at work, at home, or in various other responsibilities, we need to be alert to what’s happening around us. Take control of the things we can control and be prepared for what might impact us outside our control.
Because there are plenty of things outside our control.
4. Sometimes You’re Lucky…Sometimes You’re Not
While games like chess require a lot of strategic thinking, some games are more dependent on lucky dice rolls or the flip of a card. In fact, there are thousands of board games, card games, and dice games where the outcome is heavily impacted by luck. There are also many games that strike a great balance between both strategy and luck.
But whether a game is mostly driven by luck or just has a bit of luck, we learn time and time again that Luck Happens. Sometimes everything rolls our way and we get lucky and love it. Celebrate those times.
And other times the dice hate us and we run out of luck.
Life is full of things outside our control. While being in control provides a great sense of security, manliness requires us to learn how to be comfortable with luck – both good luck for us and bad luck against us.
Bad things will happen. It’s how we deal with it that makes the difference.
5. Be Tough
Not only do we have to be tough when bad luck strikes out against us, but we also have to be tough when we lose (whether by luck, wits, or skill). It’s pretty obvious that the vast majority of games pit opponents against each other. For one player or team to win, others will lose.
A very strong lesson learned by playing board games is how to be a good sport in both winning and losing. Parents all over the world experience the emotional fallout kids express when they lose a game – screaming, throwing pieces, tossing game boards, punching siblings, and more.
One of the most sought after pieces of advice from parents as it relates to playing board games is how to teach their kids to be good losers.
We wish there was a silver bullet. However, there’s not just one way for this to be done. A couple years ago we shared 7 tips for teaching kids to lose gracefully that are always very relevant.
Whatever methods are employed, repeated attempts are essential. Patience is required to teach it. And it’s tough. But please stick with it.
Because unfortunately this is a lesson many people never learn. It takes tough skin to be a gracious loser. Being tough enough to lose graciously is another mark of a great man.
Board games provide a fantastic lab for developing this key quality of manliness.
Those are the 5, but always keep learning
Board games aren’t just for kids.
No matter what stage you’re at in life, there’s something you can learn from board games. And even if you’ve mastered all the skills listed above, playing board games will keep your mind sharp.
Plus, they’re a lot of fun!
When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
1 Corinthians 13:11
Sure, Candyland may be one of those “childish things” to put away as you become a man. But there are plenty of thought provoking, engaging, and challenging board games that are meant for men like you – and for teaching your boys to become men as well.
Not interested in those lessons?
Not every board game or card game likes to teach the above lessons. Here are a number of games that contradict some of these important manly lessons:
Don’t Like Taking Turns? Try…
Want to Break the Rules? Try…
Don’t Like Paying Attention or Preparing for you Next Move? Try…
Feeling Unlucky? Remove all Luck and Try…
Want More Than 1 Winner? Try…
What manly lessons have you learned from playing board and card games?
Those lessons mentioned above are all true and I strongly agree on all of it. It is really nice that kids will still be exposed to board games because we now have lots of gadgets that kids are enjoying and parents should teach their child of games that are educational and can help them mold to be a good person.
So true Alice.
So this worked with my 5 year old as he was screaming about losing to his 3 year old brother in a game (well, after the screaming ended).
Me: When you win how do you want me to act? Should I scream, or say good job and give you a high five?
Him: Say good job.
Me: What do you think your brother wants when he wins, you to scream or say good job?
Him: (sullen) Say good job.
Me: Well…?
Him: (turns to his brother and in obviously forced niceness) Good job.
Then they both perked up.
Chad – that’s an awesome story and teaching moment. Thanks for sharing and keep up the great parenting!